When Grandmother Speaks…

Not quite two weeks ago, my friend went to the doctor to have a lump removed from her shoulder. She came away with a diagnosis of Stage 4 cancer. Within a few days she was on morphine and day before yesterday had an incident of some sort.

Yesterday I was called to her bedside. She had instructions for me. First she let me know what she wanted said at her memorial service and I agreed. Then she told me she wanted me to add a chapter to her final book. The chapter is to be about how she died and how the 12 Steps worked in her life. I can and will do that.

She’s dying with dignity. Her daughters are with her and her son spent a good 20 minutes on the phone with her. Love and surrender were in the air.

And I’m pretty close to shattered. Came home and updated a mutual friend – well, that’s what I thought I was doing. Mid conversation I realized I was processing or trying to process it all.

I’ve found great comfort in reading Ken Wilbur’s One Taste. Somehow his descriptions of his own life and his attempt to form a truly integral philosophy that includes everything from science to spirituality, to Sprit, resonates and reassures me.

I’m grieving, of course, which is odd because she isn’t gone yet. I feel both empty and grateful – grateful she’s conscious and her faith is so strong. There’s so much we don’t understand on an intellectual level.

Love and blessings,

I have no clear idea what I’m doing with this blog… I can’t let it go and I haven’t posted in so long. Maybe it’s about my own spiritual journey.

Years ago, back in my Young Republican days, I discovered neighbors who belonged to the Society of Friends or Quakers. I’ve long forgotten exactly what we were talking about, but as a country we were deep in the cold war, and I suspect I was arguing for a strong defense.

I don’t even remember his name, but he said something to me that has rung in my head ever since: “But Anne, we’ve never tried peace.”

In the moment I was struck dumb, realizing he was right. The people of our wonderful planet have never, as a whole, or even as a majority, tried peace.

Of course, I’ve learned some things, like we’ve never really tried to eliminate poverty or social injustice. Not as a world ‘round project.

I don’t know how to get there, but I truly believe it’s worth contemplating.

“Mankind must put an end to war, or war will put an end to mankind…War will exist until that distant day when the conscientious objector enjoys the same reputation and prestige that the warrior does today. “– John F. Kennedy Found at Peace Quotes(http://www.indianchild.com/Peace_Quotations.htm)

This seems so very obvious to me, and probably to most people. The only question is “How?” Or maybe it’s “When?”

With love and gratutude,

The goal of the Department of Peace is to create a Cabinet-level
Department of Peace, so the President and the rest of the government would always be presented with peaceful options.

I think this is a terrific idea – we are so used to war as a way to solve problems. It seems only reasonable to at least consider peaceful choices.

This legislation will re-introduced in the House of Representatives as a tribute to victims of September 11th, during a fabulous conference in Washington DC, Sept. 10-12.

Even if you can’t attend, spread the word, about the conference and about Creating a Department of Peace.

Peace comes from being able to contribute the best that we have, and all that we are, toward creating a world that supports everyone. But it is also securing the space for others to contribute the best that they have and all that they are. ~ Hafsat Abiola – found at Peace Center Peace Quotes.

This really rings true for me – if everyone were truly free to contribute their best… what kind of a wonderful world would that be!

Some days I simply want to ignore all the ills of the world… it’s all so overwhelming. Other days I want to rush out and try and fix things. Either position seems, well, extreme and probably unhelpful.

Years ago I took a workshop with Joanna Macy, a wonderful being who works for peace and love through her Buddhist tradition and deep ecology philosophies. Although I remember many things from that workshop, the piece that stands out still in my mind is our need to grieve what’s happening on our planet, and as a result, to each of us.

When I allow myself to get in touch with even a tiny portion of my deep mental anguish about the state of the world, I somehow also free myself up to take the kind of action I believe is helpful.

There are so many things to grieve, including war, terrorism, environmental degradation, the degradation of women and men and children, starvation, injustice – small wonder we all feel overwhelmed. But nothing is gained when I move into denial. And so I grieve and in the grieving my heart opens to other solutions, other ways of being.

With love and gratitude.

I’m almost finished with the first reading of Peace is the Way by Deepak Chopra. This afternoon as I read The Body of Peace, Chopra states: … whenever I say that the safest country would be one with no army and no weapons. He then points out that we already have such states and countries, including: The Vatican, Monaco, Luxembourg, many Pacific and Caribbean islands and Costa Rica.

This is something I vaguely knew, but had assumed, as most people do, that somehow these are special and exceptions.

What if, however, they are actually on the leading edge of our conscious evolution? What if they predict, if we only will allow it, a world that works for everyone?

Worth contemplating I would say.

Over at The Freelance Writing Blog I posted about Writing for Peace. Krissy, who runs SpeckBlog responded and in her post is an essential question: I wish for peace, I wish for retribution, find they are incompatible, and am stymied.

I wish I had an easy answer! My hunch, however, is that recognizing that incompatibility is a good start. My own experience tells me that any time I can become even a little bit aware of inconsistencies in my thinking, the tension, if I choose to pay attention to it, gives me the opportunity to seek new information and develop new thinking.

Right now I’m reading Deepak Chopra’s Peace is the Way. I’ve not paid a lot of attention to Chopra’s work, but this book is moving me toward more peaceful thoughts and actions. He confirms my suspicion that we can now influence our own evolution and that moving toward a peaceful world that works for everyone is our next evolutionary step. And he’s got lots of exercises and things to mediate about and new things for me to think about.

I think we have to find ways to work at changing our inconsistencies. Books are one way I do it… they aren’t they only way, and this book isn’t the only one.

Please, share your methods and your thinking.

If you’d like to join me in Writing for Peace, send me an email. We’ve got some sort of group growing – let’s explore together where it will take us.

Love and blessings,

A

Several months ago, my garage was blocked by a bright and shiny Mustang illegally parked in the alley. I started the rounds of the neighbors, asking if anyone knew who belonged to the car, getting angrier and angrier every moment. Eventually the young owner showed up, wondering what all the fuss was about. I totally lost it and screamed obscenities at him. Yelling back, he scrambled into his car and drove off.

As I was getting into my car consciousness dawned. I was mortified. Here I am, claiming to be in favor of peace, starting a war in my alley because I want to go shopping. With a quick prayer, I decided I wanted to see if I could find him, and instead of turning left onto the street, I turned right.

Sure enough, there he was, driving down the street toward me. I waved him down, parked and as I walked over to his car could see him getting ready to do battle again. “I want to apologize,” I said and watched his face turn from anger through confusion to a willingness to listen.” I told him no one deserved that kind of abuse; he told me he’d been trying to repair something in one of the apartments. I told him what would have worked better for me (emergency lights, some indication of where he was, etc. etc. etc.). He allowed as how that might have been a better approach. I thanked him and got back in my car and went on about my errands.

How was I able to get conscious so soon after totally loosing it? I think it was because I’d been meditating about and studying about finding peace within.

As I look back on that incident, I realize that I will probably never get rid of the sudden anger, even rage. I no longer think that’s the goal. Instead, I want to be able to feel all my emotions, but to move through them quickly so I stay in the present moment, for it is in the present moment that I find the peace within.

What’s your experience? How do you find peace?